What Belongs in the Drain

Sewers are a perennial source of contention here in Point Roberts. Until I moved to Canada, I’d never lived anyplace that didn’t have sewer connections. However, in both our Canadian and our Point Roberts houses, we live with septic tanks. They take some getting used to what with the variety of rules, fairy tales, and traditional sayings about how you are to live with them in order to keep the tank from needing too much attending to or the leach field from failing.

E.g., only Old Dutch cleanser, no anything with bleach, no colored toilet paper; no coffee grounds, no fats or oils, no more than one washing machine load per day, no water color paints, no any kind of paints, no garbage disposals of course, no dyes, no detergent with phosphate: really and ideally, nothing at all but clear water. Such a challenge. If one is a dyer and painter of fabric (as I am), it means that dyeing and painting of fabric are only outdoor activities, which is to say only during the center of summer when you can rely on the temperatures being warm enough for dyeing, at least, to be effective.

Of course, there is always somebody who is happy to agitate about how much better it would be if we had sewers. The state has recently expressed its disapproval of septic systems by passing a law that all septic systems must be inspected on a regular basis. And the someone who is to do this inspecting isn’t the owner of the property. But the someone also isn’t some nice state agent who comes around and provides this service. Presumably, it is some honorable businessman who has just set himself up in the business of providing these inspections, some honorable friend of someone in the legislature or perhaps many someones in the legislature. Whatcom County (our county), to its credit, is trying to come up with some in between solution in which property owners will be offered classes that will certify them as people permitted to make the official examination, but that resolution seems itself a contentious issue. I mean, who would trust a property owner to say that his/her septic system is working?

In Point Roberts itself, there is a firm belief by many that much desired economic development will come to full fruition only at that moment when the entire Point is linked together in one great community sewer pipe. Frankly, I’d rather pass on the development and the enticing sense of community that sewers would offer us, not to mention the simplification of my personal life and the increase in spending to pay for these sewers. On the other hand, I read today that "Looking to honor the forty-third President of the United States of America, George W. Bush, the recently formed Presidential Memorial Commission of San Francisco is looking to change the name of the Oceanside Wastewater Treatment Facility. It seems the group would like to rename the SF Zoo adjacent facility the 'George W Bush Sewage Plant.'"

It is possible that if Point Roberts’ sewer enthusiasts would promise to name our putative sewage system after the 43rd president, that might be a project one could agree to support.